Saturday, December 30, 2006

Celebrity Death Report.

James Brown - Heart Failure

Gerald Ford - Natural Causes


Saddam Hussein - Hanging

Okay, I'll get right to it. Does a state ordered execution count in the celebrity death count? Do we need to be watching the google news page for another celeb to drop?

Who would be your pick? Add to the comments.

thePrisoner (Saddam we hardly knew ye!)

Friday, December 29, 2006

Cheese Friday™ Last of 2006

It's the last Cheese Friday™ of the year.

Celebrate accordingly.

Have a safe and Happy New Year.

Mr. DNA (never plays it safe)

Friday, December 22, 2006

Cheese Friday™ : Happy Holidays!

When you care enough to send the very best, send the gift of Cheese.

Happy Cheese Friday!

Read the story of the Christmas Cheese.

Mr. DNA (can't wait to see what Santa left under the tree)

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

I promise to see this movie in a theater!

Yesterday I could care less about this movie.
... cartoon made into a movie by Michael Bay, blah, blah blah.
But today, I promise you I will see this movie, in a theater.
Really, I will actually set foot in a movie theater to take in the spectacle.

I don't know why, but I feel compelled. I'm guessing that the almighty Bay has created a new device that can hypnotize people to submit to his every whim. Of course with that promise (see above) comes the knowledge of all the past unfulfilled promises of my life. Way too many to list. So in reality on July 4th I'll probably skip this movie the same way I skipped almost all of the event movies and promises I've made in the last 9 years.

But if the movie gets released tomorrow I guarantee I'll see it! (unless I'm too busy, you know, the kids and stuff)

Mr. DNA (promises to make it up to you)

Evil Dead: The Musical! Update

Here are a few links to check out:

The official website,

the myspace page,

and some awesome testimonials.

Mr. DNA (doesn't understand the musical theater)

Another Opportunity To Vote

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Sunday, December 17, 2006

This Is Shit

thePrisoner (disgusted)

Friday, December 15, 2006

Cheese Friday™

Every Thursday night I have trouble falling asleep.

Why you ask?

Because I know when I wake up it will be Cheese Friday.

Can I get a witness?

Mr. DNA (has a very understanding wife)

Thursday, December 14, 2006

We haven't posted in a while.

I Guess we're all busy. Tis the season...

When I saw this, I thought of you.

Click on the pic to watch Dan Marino's anger management techniques in action.

Mr. DNA (not only the president, I'm also a client.)

Friday, December 01, 2006

Cheese Friday: Frequent Cheese Miles

If you buy Cheese you can get Frequent Flyer Miles.
Swiss Knight Fondues and Snack Wedges "now earn 500 American Airlines AAdvantage® miles with the purchase of specially marked boxes of Swiss Knight".


"This weekend I was handed an opened wheel of processed cheeses by a friend. He said that his brother-in-law had caught wind of a frequent flyer promotion whereby you get 500 miles for each purchase of this cheese wheel and had purchased 75,000 miles for ~$300, which also means he's got more opened cheese wheels than he knows what to do with."
Click here to read more.


-Mr. DNA (is flying high on Cheese)

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Forget Snow Tires, These Tires Rock.

Just a friendly reminder kids, when you take the photos off your digital camera, be sure and name them.
Otherwise the ad on Craigslist will have 3 photos of your Hummer Wheels, and one photo of your brother the crackhead bustin' some rock up in the hizzy.

thePrisoner (renaming photos right now, leave a message at the beep)

Monday, November 27, 2006

Watch & Enjoy

Friday, November 24, 2006

Cheese Friday: Thanksgiving (a little late).

I just want to say thanks to everyone who visits occasionally. Especially the people who visit and don't send me emails telling me to rot in Hell or wishing harm to my son. Even though most of you don't comment I know about 50 or so check the site daily. I hope all of you had a nice Thanksgiving. If you live outside the USA, umm, I hope you had a nice Thursday.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Just in case you missed it...

US Education Secretary Margaret Spellings lost to Michael McKean on 'Jeopardy'.

You may remember her as the government official who wanted PBS to give back any federal funds they used for an episode of "Postcards from Buster". In the episode called 'Sugartime!" Buster goes to Vermont and meets children from two families, who show him how maple syrup and cheese are made. At one of the homes, Buster is introduced to all of the children and to the two moms. One girl explains that one of the women is her "stepmom," whom she says she loves a lot. Spellings said, "many parents would not want their young children exposed to the life-styles portrayed in this episode." I interpret this as a nice way of saying, "we (the government) don't want to encourage those gay people".

So Lenny, AKA David St. Hubbins, kicked her ass on Jeopardy and he's not even gay, go figure.

BREAKING NEWS: People Still Suck

from Yahoo News:

MEMPHIS, Tenn. - A church that wanted to do something special for Hurricane Katrina victims gave a $75,000 house, free and clear, to a couple who said they were left homeless by the storm. But the couple turned around and sold the place without ever moving in, and went back to New Orleans.

"Take it up with God," an unrepentant Joshua Thompson told a TV reporter after it was learned that he and the woman he identified as his wife had flipped the home for $88,000.

Nice people eh?

Makes me wish that there WAS a god, because he'd get a big laugh out of this. I wish there was a hell too, because Josh and his wife Delores certainly deserve a 3 bed 2 bath in one of the better neighborhoods.

thePrisoner (had to edit this A LOT before posting it. Most F'bombs ever)

Monday, November 20, 2006

Cool video of artist sketching...

This is a a video done by a comic book artist I like named Josh Middleton. Thought some people here who are into drawing might appreciate it. Justin can make fun of it if he can get his dial up modem to download it.

He says he used Corel Painter 9.5 to do the drawing. It was a 16 minute video sped up to fit in the 10 minutes that youtube gives you. You can visit his blog here.

I Just Do What I'm Told... Sometimes.

Because Everyone Else Is...

Friday, November 17, 2006

South Parked

WOW looks just like me...and my surroundings.'s swell.

Me southpark

I don't think it works to good for me. My head is too skinny to be a Southpark charater.
And I'm not "husky".

Go, Do, Post

South Park Character Generator

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Hey, how come thePrisoner ain't got a blender?

A: Because he'd do crazy junk like this, all day long.

thePrisoner (knew it would blend)

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Eat Like Snake.

Someone sends you a youtube link.
You click it and aren't paying a whole bunch of attention to it.

Then suddenly you think maybe you're having an... episode. So you watch it again.
Then you want to go to Burger King for lunch.

Yeah, me too.

or (paraphrased from on online chat)


(1 minute later)

JOHN:did you ever watch something when you were stoned, and start thinking that what you think you are watching you can't actually be watching because no one makes TV like what is inside your head?


JOHN:because that commercial made me think I was stoned.

JIM:yep. it's weird.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Cheese Friday... Night!

How sad my life has become.
Tasty, but sad none the less.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006


Giving hope to disillusioned losers everywhere. Britney Spears has filed for divorce. Kevin Federline (known to no-one as K-Fed) is likely to vanish almost without trace, however he will be an answer in upcoming trivial pursuit games, along with Ojani Noa, Cris Judd and Jason Allen Alexander.

thePrisoner (Brit, call me)

Vote Quote

As seen on Boing Boing:

From Warren Ellis's BAD SIGNAL mailing list: "Karl Rove is not Aleister Crowley, Severus Snape, Darth Vader or Satan. You can kill him by ensuring your vote is counted and being vigilant at your polling station."

If you don't know who Karl Rove is, then he has already won. Imagine Kaiser Soze without the charm and subtlety. If you don't who Kaiser Soze is, get Netflix for crap's sakes.

I'm not going to blow smoke into certain very private places and tell you that it doesn't matter who you vote for, just vote. It does matter who you vote for, but if you make a commitment to vote, you might just start paying attention to what your guy did, is doing or wants to do. Even if we disagree, I have to give you mad props just for getting involved.

Remember kids, voting burns calories and can ward off certain kinds of cancer.

Toby Wallwork (putting a 1 in the W column)

Vote Today

It's your last chance to have your say. If you don't, you have to wait another 2 years.

Friday, November 03, 2006

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Are you voting?

Not voting? Then don't complain.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Hits 91.1 Tells It Like It Is!!

"So, how's that new format change working out for you guys?"
"Uh, not so good."


get to the office, sit down, let all the e-mail crap hit you in the face, shrug it off and get on with it, kind of feel OK, get back to the project you've been working on forever (it seems) find out that most of what you did yesterday is no longer what the client wanted, figure you'll get right back on it after lunch, look at the clock and notice it's only 10:10?

Only 10:10.
Only ten f'n ten...

Yeah, me too.

thePrisoner (is free for lunch, in 2 hours)

Friday, October 27, 2006

Cheese Friday: Wisconsin needs more problems.

Wisconsin Gov. Jim Doyle. Shown here waving to Brett Favre.

Wisconsin governor vows to keep Wisconsin no. 1 for cheese

MADISON, Wis. (AP) -
California cheese is becoming a campaign issue in Wisconsin.
The governor of that state says he'll do everything in his power if he wins re-election to keep Wisconsin number one in cheese production. Governor Jim Doyle says he'll increase state incentives to help cheese plants upgrade and train their workers.

He's also vowing that Wisconsin won't take a backseat to California as long as he's governor.
The campaign promise from the Wisconsin governor comes as California officials expect to eventually pass Wisconsin in cheese production. Wisconsin produced 2.4 billion pounds of cheese last year, which is more than a quarter of the national total. California was slightly behind.

Maybe I should move to Wisconsin. If Cheese production is a campaign issue then they must not have many problems.

I don't know why he's fighting it though. The great state of California will take over eventually. We always do. If you struggle, it only hurts more. (This phrase works great on the ladies.)

-Mr. DNA (doesn't want you to struggle)

Thursday, October 26, 2006

WWJD?: What Would Joo Do, bro?

So, I'm going to the bathroom (I mean going TO the bathroom, not you
know... poopin' as I type) and as I open the door I can tell that there
is a dude in the stall (it's a one-staller). He comes out of the stall
and leaves (no handy washy) when I enter the stall it looks like i
caught him in his office. There is an Arrowhead water bottle (cap off,
half full) a copy of Skateborder magazine on the floor and the old
throne has NOT been floosh'd. Awesome.

I guess the trip to the potty was this guy's first 'break' all day.

So I ask you dear reader, should I have chased the guy down and said
something? Or do we agree that other people's bathroom protocols
(however weird) are their own business?

Have ever eaten or drank a beverage while in the can? Wait a sec, mebbe
I don't want to know.

Needless to say, I ain't shaking hands with any new people I meet
--thePrisoner (from his real off, not 'the office')

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Mark Brown Looks Nervous

thanks to Brent for the tip.

thePrisoner (wasn't anywhere near there, at that time)

Monday, October 23, 2006

Sunday, October 22, 2006


Watch this movie, then leave your review in the comments.

I Hope You Like Pain - video powered by Metacafe

Wednesday, October 18, 2006


Ok, so I don't usually tell people to stay home and watch TV but this is different.

First off, the dudes from American Movie...
Second, my buddy Colby is working on the show.

Few people are really up on the supernatural history of the greater Milwaukee area, I myself had to refer to my copy of Tobin's Spirit Guide for details and they were few and far betwixt. If you don't have a copy then that's all the more reason to join Mark and Mike on G4 Halloween night at 8E (which is 5 Pacific).

Besides, when was the last time anyone ever said, "Live From Wisconsin"? Set the Tivo kids.

thePrisoner (ain't got Tivo)

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Happy Birthday Mike Judge

Andy: Birthday

Happy Birthday Andy...

Hi Andy this is TV personality David "The Hoff" Hasslehoff with a special birthday wish for you.
Andy, I wish I weren't so darn busy right now. If had some free time then we'd go play some Gauntlet™ down at Nickels O'Fun the new video arcade down at the mall. I like to play as the Valkyrie because I like to feel pretty and pretend to have breastesses. But enough about me, what about you? Oh yeah, this isn't a chat room and you can't answer me, (stupid Hoff stupid stupid).
As you may have guessed, I'm back in the 'special hospital' again, it's time for my semi-annual pain killer addiction to flare up for a week or so.

Hey do you remember that time on Miami Vice where Sonny lost his memory and was a bad guy for like half a season? Man, was that weird or what? I wish they'd done stuff like that on my show, I never got to be the evil lifeguard... ah well, regrets are ten a penny at the drive-thru, as the old song goes.

Well, I'd better go now. Merry Xmas in case I forget, or Quonset if'n you're of a Hebrew persuasion.


Friday, October 06, 2006

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

And just like that... you're home.

Orange Alerts notwithstanding, I am back in Orange County.
The flight was rough and the movies were rougher.
I paid five bucks for cheese crackers and vacuum sealed salami - what
has happened to flying?
Anyway, back to work tomorrow and pretend none of this ever happened.
--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

CIRSF: Epilogue

All over now except the crying.

Since Sunday Nels and I have been performing the most unglamorous part of the film fest process. Returning tables, packing up equipment, and answering e-mails from filmmakers who just don't get it.

Some of the prints got picked up by their owners.
Mute, by Melissa Joan Hart (yes, Sabrina the Teenage Witch) is playing at a fest in Fort Lauderdale next week, so we dropped it off at the Post Office personally.

The sun is going down and the forecast is for heavy rain (last night it was a cloudburst I couldn't believe it) and we are rolling west towards the expressway that will take us to O'Hare, and take me home to California.

--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

Monday, October 02, 2006

Clap You Hands Everybody and Everybody Clap Your Hands...

Please Hollywood, stop remaking movies that were already perfect.

Obligatory intoxicatophoto

--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Attention Hottie Filmmakers

Hey, we played your film. Remember like 6 hours ago when you were
talking to us? Now the screening is over and you totally blew us off,
that ain't exactly polite, not cool. You didn't even have the customary
1 drink at the meet and greet.
Bad form ladies, bad form.

--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

Real Butter

This industrial container holds the delicious 'buttery' topping that the
Davis uses on it's popcorn. You might notice the small, incredibly
slick puddle just to the top of the frame.

--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

Saturday's Ad in Chicago Sun-Times

--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

Friday, September 29, 2006

Second Show, this is a piece of cake!

Second show is Nels' third smoke break.
A light drizzle hasn't stopped the turnout.
A local guy has brought in about 40 friends, all ticket buyers, we love them.

--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

We Are The Ones That Do The Work

Dan is a three year veteran of the show.
He should know better.
Me? I'm in it for the chicks.
I should know better.

--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

Enjoy The Show.

The first show has begun.
"Growing Up Sucks" is a show we've done every year.
The fest is officially under way.
I could use a coffee.

--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

Cheese Friday: What is it with bass players and Cheese?

Blur bassist Alex James (the one on the left) has revealed that he is ready to start producing his own cheese.

"The more I think about cheese," wrote James, "the more I like it and the more I want some, which is why I'm taking matters into my own hands and venturing into the world of independent cheese making."
Click here to read more.


-Mr. DNA (also has a future in cheese, a past too.)

The Sound System Has Been Fixed!

... kinda.
--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

12 Hours To Go...

I feel that we may have lost momentum. I thought we were done, but it
looks like we aren't.
The two photos or my watch were taken 24 hours apart. I have made a
bunch of show reels (right now I'm making the 'best of..' reel, the
audience's favorite will be dropped in at the very end).
I'm kinda burned. A lot of the grief I forget about is back with a
vengeance. Nels has stopped answering me when I ask him what it is
Scott actually does. Nels did a lot this year (even more than usual)
but I think he's a bit fried too. He's being a bit snappy and I resist
the urge to tell him that he must have forgotten who he's talking to (it
worked last year).
In 12 hours we'll be at the theater. Nels will be setting up the
projector, we'll all pretend that the hum isn't anywhere near as bad as
it was, Scott will walk around saying what 'we' should have done but did
not (just like last year) and no one will pay the slightest bit of
attention to him (just like last year).
This year we have a sponsor that might actually put butts on seats, the
Chicago Sun-Times has slapped their name upon us. I wonder what that
might mean...
The King Tut hat was just to help me feel good about myself.

--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Introducing The Davis

Today we inspected the sound system at the Davis, the theater we are using this year. It is not as old as the 3 Penny Theater (our first home) but still has little in common with the larger chain theaters. Of course we'd never be able to get into one of those places.

It's a nice old theater. The manager is very accommodating, but he got very nervous when we broke out the RadioShack™ bag o'cables to wire us into their audio system. It must've been like when Joe Morton gets that Terminator arm in T2 because our technology was light years beyond the stuff we found in the projection booth. The manager immediately fell to his knees and began chanting. Talk about awkward moments...

Like I said this is a nice old theater, the kind of place that will surely be gone before too long. All the signs were made on the managers Windows95 Paintbox program, there were lots of labels made out of papertape and a general lack of knowledge when it comes to figuring out how this stuff all works together. Guess what? It doesn't.

There is a slight hum, a ground hum. It's not terrible, but if it were gone we'd be really happy. After much speculation (but decidedly little action) I found myself behind the screen tracing the audio cables to the speaker. It is cramped and dark and dusty with cobwebs. When I find a link in the cables I'm surprised that we're getting any sound at all. In my hands I was holding exposed wires and the twist caps holding them together. When I give them a jiggle I am both surprised and disappointed. The audio is not interrupted. So the twist ties work, which is good. But I haven't found the source of the hum, which is bad.

Chalk this up as, To Be Continued...

I have to go and make some more show reels.

--toby wallwork (from Sidekick)