I Have Had A Day

Nothing extremely good happened, nothing bad whatsoever.

It's been a day, and for that I'm thankful.

And now I sit here wandering the internet looking for news of the outisde world. Something to let me know that others too are having days.

Jelly-filled days of excitement and wonder.

I read through some poetry I wrote when I was in high school. I was smart at one point, what happened? "Everything was going great until Jesus made me fubmble."

The first time is always the hardest...

I'm re-thinking my new career as a Director/Producer of adult films.

REMO WILLIAMS KICKS ASS!

"HELL YEAH, I DO!"

Putting the VICE in Vice-President

"Call me MISTER Cheney, BITCH!!"

I don't want to go all political on the smartpatrol, but I have to draw our readers attentions to this strory, (stolen from boingboing).


"On Tuesday, Cheney, serving in his role as president of the Senate, appeared in the chamber for a photo session. A chance meeting with Sen. Patrick J. Leahy (Vt.), the ranking Democrat on the Judiciary Committee, became an argument about Cheney's ties to Halliburton Co., an international energy services corporation, and President Bush's judicial nominees. The exchange ended when Cheney offered some crass advice.


'Fuck yourself,' said the man who is a heartbeat from the presidency."

...Even if the Senate were in session, the vice president, though constitutionally the president of the Senate, is an executive branch official and therefore free to use whatever language he likes."

Thanks for that update on our First Amendment rights, DICK

Is it the Red Skull?

picture above is the boy at 7 months old

June 24, 2004, 12:02AM
LINDA A. JOHNSON Associated Press

Somewhere in Germany is a baby Superman, born in Berlin with bulging arm and leg muscles.

Not yet five, he can hold 7lbs weights with arms extended, something many adults cannot do. He has muscles twice the size of other children his age and half their body fat.

DNA testing showed why: the boy has a genetic mutation that boosts muscle growth.

The discovery, reported in Thursday's New England Journal of Medicine, marks the first documented human case of such a mutation.

Steve Rogers is our only hope.

BREAKING NEWS: LAPD still not huge fans of Black Folks. Is that really news to anyone?

In what should come as a complete surprise to no one, the Los Angeles Police Department finds itself at the doorway of another scandal.

News affiliates would love to hype this as Rodney King II: Electric Boogaloo, but the sorry fact is that no matter how offensive the act was, no matter how over-the-top the officer reacted... the viewing audience just collectively sighs and says "Again?", not out of shock or disgust, just out of not looking forward to the irritation and mess to follow. Self appointed 'figures in the community' are already clamoring for camera time and dusting off the speeches that they didn't get around to reading back in 1992.
Those of us with a pretty good memory will recall that not a whole lot has changed since the last go around. Those of us with not-so-good memories might want to check out "April 29th 1992" by Sublime.

I will be at Circuit City waiting to pick up my free TV. If the revolution is televised then I'll be sure and wave to the camera.

SPOTLIGHT: Internet "Not Just For Porn" Says Local Halfwit

PHOTO: Benji Hottencourt is just one of the Orange County's 'special needs folks' invited to an exciting computer display at the county fairgrounds this week.
"I don't know what this other stuff is for", admitted Hottencourt, 26 "but it's not wall-to-wall boobs like my brother said it was". Later Hottencourt was overheard saying he was impressed by "all the cool stuff, but the boob thing was kind of a letdown".

Will The Real Superman Please Stand Up?

"Not so fast, Slouchy"

We All Agree...

That beating women up is more than likely a bad thing right?

But is it alright for us to beat the living shit/holy hell/snot out of these freakishly domineering Pageant Moms? These oddities of humanity need to be seriously (and preferrably physically) hurt.

Just thought I'd ask.

A Biggie It Is Not

And by "Biggie" I don't mean a large shake or fries at Wendy's.

If there is one thing I know for no good reason and to no financial or personal gain, it's music trivia junk.

Once in a great while, I can win a movie triva contest, as in the great "Seventh Sign/Seventh Seal" debate and the "John Malkovich In Silence Of The Lambs" debacle.

Sometimes, we're right and sometimes we're wrong, all that matters is that one of the Smart Patrol knows the true skinny.

And knowin' the skinny is phat.