Friday, December 11, 2009

Happy Holidays

-Mr. DNA (thinks x-mas is awesome)

Tuesday, December 08, 2009


I appreciate that these guys parody what I do for a living, but they do it better. I also intend to cry about it.

thePrisoner (you know we got it)

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Muppets + Bohemian Rhapsody = Happy

-Mr. DNA (Go home! Go home! bye bye.)

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

-Mr. DNA (remembers that, Pepperidge Farm remembers)

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

From Annie Hall

I don't want to blaspheme and speak ill of The Holy Trinity (Star Wars, Empire, Jedi) but Annie Hall really did deserve that Oscar™ in 1977 after all.

I dream about this scene, except in my dream we follow the guy back to his house, wait until night, nail the front door shut and set the place on the fire.

Then after the family climbs down a rope made of knotted bed sheets and huddles together on the driveway watching their home go up in flames I step forward and tell the children,
while pointing into the heart of the inferno...

and... SCENE

I looked this up once in one of those dream analysis books and (although I'm paraphrasing somewhat) basically it said I'm really well-adjusted and emotionally healthy.

Which is nice.

thePrisoner (is nice)

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Russian Herbie Might Kick American Herbie's Butt

Black Lightning is not your father's Love Bug.

Friday, October 02, 2009

A Serious Message About Insurance.

thePrisoner (fighting robots since 1992)

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Louis C.K.

It's a slow build, but worth the wait.

-Mr. DNA (is slow)

Monday, September 14, 2009

The People Who Died Guy...Died.

Jim Carroll, best known for both the song "People Who Died" and the book The Basketball Diaries, has died at age 60.

Friday, September 04, 2009

Gus Porter, American Legend

thePrisoner (what's that in real money?)

Slab City

This is a bit of a weird one. Slab City is a squat/collective type place out by California's Salton Sea. A wilderness of Meth and a full dress rehearsal of the post-apocalypse. It's a little bit long (20 minutes), so be sure and watch it at work.

if it's not working for you click here

thePrisoner (can't stand the heat)

Cheese Friday™ ?

Cheese Bank. This is so Ms. PacMan*.

Mr. DNA (is now 24†, so he's looking back at all the things he's done)

*Ms. PacMan is totally awesome!
†Age is approximate

Thursday, September 03, 2009

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Local Adventurer Celebrates Birthday

Mr. DNA: Here seen endorsing an automated Ice Selling Machine while purchasing gasoline somewhere in the American Southwest.

Gather round, good people. Check the calendar and make sure if you must, but I assure you that today is the date and our good friend (and a founding Smart Patroll-er), Mr. DNA is having himself a birthday this very day. Please join us in wishing him the very best of birthdays, but speak up, because at his advanced years we can't expect a full range of auditory response.

When not tracking the, North American Bigfoot across the 48 contiguous Federal States, 10 provinces and 3 territories of Royal Canadia, Mr. DNA can often be found at his sprawling California ranch with his lovely wife, Bernadette, his wonderful children, Inky and Princess, and their poorly behaved dog, Kit.

In his free time, Mr. DNA enjoys collecting folk art, playing power pop music with his band, The New Dover Smoothtones and buying gasoline as he was when in the above Photostatic™ was captured.

His exact age is not known, but is believed to be somewhere around 67 or a number that rhymes with 67.

Happy Birthday and Good Hunting!

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Generation A by Douglas Coupland

It is September, time to think about maybe reading a book this year.
Douglas Coupland wrote a book. Probably no pictures, but not a lot of big words either.
BTW I have always thought j was a bit of an afterthought myself.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

LEAKED: New iPhone Commercial

Blackberry just cannot match these features.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Toby Wallwork doesn't want to bore you... but!

My demo is delightfully brief... hopefully it is entertaining on another level.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Holy Balls, Now I Wants Me A Shotgun!!!

This dude has the best job ever!!!
(Toby, can you make an infomercial with this guy? I'd buy anything he wants to sell me as long as it's full of bird shot.)

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Do you remember?

Our good friend Eric Gustavo Petersen shot this.

Good job my friend.

-Mr. DNA (Pepperidge Farm remembers)

Saturday, July 04, 2009

An Annual Tradition.

She's waitin' for me
when I get home from work
oh, but things ain't just the same
She turns out the light
and cries in the dark
won't answer when I call her name

On the stairs I smoke a
cigarette alone
Mexican kids are shootin'
fireworks below
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July

She gives me her cheek
when I want her lips
but I don't have the strength to go
On the lost side of town
in a dark apartment
we gave up trying so long ago

On the stairs I smoke a
cigarette alone
Mexican kids are shootin'
fireworks below
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July

What ever happened I
so dry your tears and baby
walk outside, it's the Fourth of July

On the stairs I smoke a
cigarette alone
Mexican kids are shootin'
fireworks below
Hey baby, it's the Fourth of July
Hey baby, Baby take a walk outside

Written By John Doe and Exene Cervenka

Happy Birthday America,
from The Smart Patrol

Friday, July 03, 2009

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

For Mr. Kamikaze

-Mr. DNA (thinks monkeys can be funny sometimes, contrary to popular belief)

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

New Fox Reality Show Requires Short Attention Span

While American recovers from the Jon and Kate bombshell (spoiler alert, she's a MAN). Fox's new reality show is ready to roll. Requiring a short attention span, it is sure to wow audiences (albeit briefly).

Dramatic Chipmunk Hey - Parry Gripp

ThePrisoner (already forgot what he was thinking)

Friday, June 05, 2009

Han Solo, P.I. - a prayer

Dear Holy Jeebus,
please make this TV show and put it on Hulu or something.
Also bring back MacGuyver because it is wicked awesome.

thePrisoner (always wished Rick did more on the show)

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

This is fascinating, anyone COULD do this but you have to be a "David Lynch Type" for anyone to care. Luckily David Lynch is a "David Lynch Type" (maybe the only one?). Maybe it's a little precious in it's conceit (much like that last sentence) but if you have five minutes to spare...
you have to click, it doesn't let me embed the movie file...

thePrisoner (accidentally mis-quoted The Smiths)

Sunday, May 31, 2009

The Vendor Client relationship - in real world situations

I wish I had made this because it is so right on. If you have ever heard me complain about my job/life (as if they were 2 separate things, ha!) it's because this is my life and it sucks. PLEASE DON'T LET MY SOBBING PREVENT YOU FROM ENJOYING THE CLIP.

thePrisoner (will make it up on the next one)

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Friday, May 22, 2009

Black and White People Furniture - BUT NO ASIANS!!!

Black, white? It doesn't matter, this commercial is wonderful. Even hispanics get a nod.

In fact only 40% of the worlds population ISN'T included.

We've come a long way, America!!

thePrisoner (and the blackPrisoner, too!)

We're all so small.

Galactic Center of Milky Way Rises over Texas Star Party from William Castleman on Vimeo.

I think I may reconsider my drug free life.

-Mr. DNA

Thursday, May 14, 2009

What Were YOU Doing When You Were Nine?

Jason, Andy and I saw this kid when he opened for Lebowski-fest last week. In person he is, in fact, clearly a midget or a robot in a costume.
However he still shreds and therefore I move down the list of the World's Greatest Guitarists one more position.

I'm somewhere around six billion, but moving down steadily as the population grows.

Friday, May 08, 2009

Is This Out There Somewhere?

I'm searching Amazon right now...


Saturday, April 25, 2009

Wacky Bricks

another great reason to buy a bunch of digital projectors.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

New Star Wars TV Show Looks Great, But Familiar.

I hope they have an episode where Luke's evil twin is played by David Hasselhoff with a soul patch.

thePrisoner(now I am the master)

Monday, April 13, 2009

Japan is Awesome!!!

Need to know how to defend yourself from zombies? Check out this Japanses TV show teaching little kids some fantastic zombie fighting tactics.

Sunday, April 05, 2009

Pretty Sure That Is Wrong.

3 miles from home, my exercise plan takes a turn for the worse.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Let's Go To Chicago.

Hello from John Wayne Airport.
Going to Chicago for Nels' wedding.
Do you remember when flying was exciting and fun?
Me neither.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Dogs Love Corn

Woofing for butter.


Watch CBS Videos Online

On a side note, John McEwen rocks that beard hard.

- Mr. DNA (has news worthy friends)

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Guitar Hero gets SUPERAWESOMER™

Once this song melts the rock-out center of your brain you will never be the same. Also if you try to count the clich├ęs in this little ditty you will be pretty close to the Box Office gross of Michael Bay's remake.
Also our Guitar Hero friends will be happy to know that Stan Bush's greatness will be available for free download very soon. So when can I come over and play this little baby along with "Strutter" by KISS (which is also awesome)?

thePrisoner (shreds)

Thursday, February 19, 2009

thePrisoner: Live Before A Studio Audience

This is the performance of "You Bet Your Life" that I attended courtesy of our Mr.Kamikaze. I haven't watched it all yet (there are several parts) but I was there and it was hilarious. Mostly because of me (jk).

thePrisoner (available for open mic nite)

There are more segments, but I think you can handle that yourself!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

A song for my friend Steve (Captain in training)

But what about the Salsa Authentica?

-Mr DNA (insert something witty here)

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Mysterious Disappearing Truck

How this hasn't happened to me, I have no idea.

thePrisoner (could really go for a BigGulp right now)

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Watchmen this why don't you?

blah blah watchmen, blah blah awesome.

thePrisoner (has his Halloween costume picked out)

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

My buddy, John Mayer

John Mayer is apparently a very talented musician who chicks dig. He dates Jennifer Aniston (from Friends, yay!) But I only know him as that dude I see on TMZ occasionally, and from his one episode T.V. show I saw at a friends house a few years back (I saw it at a house that had this mysterious thing called "Cable T.V." or maybe it was "Satellite". I don't know about you, but if it doesn't magically fly through the air and arrive at my house for free, I don't need it. And if, perhaps, I did need it I would borrow it from one of my "friends" via bit torrent.) Almost every time I see him on T.V. he make me laugh. I hope he makes you laugh too.

In conclusion, John Mayer = mancrush.

-Mr. DNA (Not a gay, I just play one on T.V.)

Wednesday, January 21, 2009


Thanks to Native Minniow.

-Mr. DNA (Every day is like a survival)

Monday, January 19, 2009

Free Boy George!

Boy George is now in jail because he "had chained male escort Audun Carlsen to a wall at his apartment in London's hip Shoreditch neighborhood. Carlsen had also said the singer beat him with a metal chain."

C'mon, since when is it illegal to chain up a prostitute? Isn't that part of the package deal? Give the man a break. Tomorrow when Obama starts his presidency his first order of business should be to pardon Boy George.

Wait, hold on a minute. My fact checker is trying to get my attention.

Well, apparently England is a "sovereign" nation and we have no "jurisdiction" over them. Since when? Gordon Brown better watch his back. I'm just sayin'.

-Mr. DNA (give me time to realize my crime)

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

This is a post!

Hey, how's it going? I was trying to get back in the the habit of posting stuff. It hasn't quite happened yet. I figure if there's a post here a least once a week, it's almost real. So here's the post:

I enjoy watching Friends reruns.

See, look, I'm sharing. And isn't that what this blogging stuff is all about?

-Mr. DNA (will be there for you)

Thursday, January 08, 2009

thePrisoner is NOT The Prisoner

Do yourself a favor. Click here and spend some time with The Prisoner.

As a way to gear up for their upcoming mini-series, AMC is showing (on their website) every episode of the original (and awesome) show.

Seriously, this show blew my mind the first time I saw it, which was many years ago. Shows like The Simpsons and Battlestar Galactica (the new one) and many others take some kind of reference or inspiration from the show.

The way I see it, you're already at work, you're bored, you already watched that YouTube Video that someone emailed you (and it wasn't THAT hilarious).

Go ahead, treat yourself.

thePrisoner (not The Prisoner)

Monday, January 05, 2009

Hey look another video! (Thanks Tony!)

Lasse Gjertsen.

So this Guy is an artist. He does great things.
He does those things you look at and say, " I could have done that!".

But here's the thing, you didn't.

He did.

Check out his YouTube Channel here.

-Mr. DNA (wonders when he'll go pro)

Friday, January 02, 2009

Thursday, January 01, 2009

Robocop Kidnaps Appliances For Sex?

First of all someone took Robocop on Pimp My Ride or he hijacked a PepBoys delivery truck. Then he went out for a chicken dinner and a piece of tail.