Thursday, May 29, 2008

Straight From The Hip: Me or Al Qaeda, you can't have both.


BOSTON (AP) -- Dunkin' Donuts has pulled an online advertisement featuring Rachael Ray after complaints that a fringed black-and-white scarf that the celebrity chef wore in the ad offers symbolic support for Muslim extremism and terrorism.

The coffee and baked goods chain said the ad that began appearing online May 7 was pulled over the past weekend because "the possibility of misperception detracted from its original intention to promote our iced coffee."

In the spot, Ray holds an iced coffee while standing in front of trees with pink blossoms.



"Listen Up America, this one comes straight from the hip!"

I've had it up to here with these so-called celebrities flaunting some kind of double standard in the face of good and decent people like you and me. You can call me a square, or a squid, hey, I've been called out-of-touch, I've been called troubled, I've been called delusional, and it doesn't bother me because I know what I know.

Rachel Ray, if you've thrown your hat in with these Al Qaedas and their ilk, when then you have officially lost this guy as a proud card-carrying member of your fan club. Now some folks might think it's a little extreme, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

Rachel, I hope that you come to your senses soon, I can understand that these Al Qaedas might seem fun and glamoury, heaven knows that I have felt the allure of tinsely-town and its 'A-listers' so believe me, I know what you are going through. But Rachel, this is no way to be popular, this is no way to get back at your parents or get yourself a little attention.

I'm reminded of something that came from my dear old mother, a constant source of wisdom and advice in my life. The details are cloudy, but when I use my mind's eye I can still see her put down her wine glass beside that oversized ashtray, and using the half burned filter-less Pall Mall, (her brand at the time) for dramatic punctuation, she aimed her good eye (left) on me and said "Ernie, those people are not your friends".

Now, I don't know exactly why she called me Ernie, I assume because it was already after nine at night, but the sentiment is still valid.

Rachel Ray, those people are not your friends. We love you sweetie, we need you here with us.

I'm thePrisoner, and this one comes straight from the hip!

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Wednesdays with David

Today we find out what filmmaker David Lynch thinks of product placement partnerships.



-Mr. DNA (no comment)

Friday, May 23, 2008

Cheese Friday™ : This one goes out to the one I love


You can buy some for your special someone too! Just click the above pic.




-Mr. DNA (is a hopeless romantic)

Monday, May 19, 2008

O.C. Register ranks among top sycophants in U.S.

HATE
ANGRY...

SMASH SMASH

Fries: You Have No Power Over Me!!


As Summer descends upon us (yes, it's fricking hot) Mr. Kamikaze and I look at our tubby bellies and decide that we really need to do a little something that we hope will miraculously make Mr. Tummy take a hitch-hike to Gonesville.
Wanna make a FAST Hundred bucks? Here's all you gotta do. If you catch Mr. Kamikaze or ThePrisoner eating a FRIED POTATO PRODUCT, ie. French Fries, Hash Browns, Home Fries, etc. and tag them (maybe even a photo) then you win, we're busted and everyone will know that we have zero will power and are suckers for the spuds.
To be clear, we aren't haters for the taters, mashed, boiled, baked, toasted, curried, or raw are still ok. Fried is right off the table and out of the question.
Now the small print.

ONLY THE FIRST PERSON TO CATCH US WINS THE HUNDY - CHANCES ARE IF ONE OF US LOSES THEN WE'LL BOTH GO ON A MAD BINGE OF AMERICAS GREATEST FRENCH FRIES - ALSO DON'T SLIP A FRY INTO OUR FOOD AND TRICK US INTO EATING ONE - SAME GOES WITH RUFIES - DON'T GO DOSING US JUST FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES, THOUGH I ADMIT IT WOULD BE RETARDED FUNNY IF I WAS TRIPPING BALLS AT DENNY'S BECAUSE YOU DROPPED A COUPLE OF TABS IN MY MASHED TATERS. BUT DON'T BECAUSE IF THE TRIP GOES BAD I COULD LOSE MY SHIT AND BE A FREAK LIKE THE DUDE FROM PINK FLOYD WHO DID A LOT OF ACID AND THEN DISAPPEARED FOR LIKE 20 YEARS.

thePrisoner (already Jonesin' for muh grease sticks)

Saturday, May 17, 2008

All of your cheese-making dreams can finally be realized.

This book was "given" to me by an anonymous friend.

I know that this is a big no-no here, but I couldn't resist.



If anyone wishes to be "given" a copy of this book, I will post the link in the comments.

But I must first be "given" approval by Mr.DNA.

Friday, May 16, 2008

Cheese Friday™ : NACHOS!!!


Mmmm. Stadium Nachos.





-Mr. DNA

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?: Taking pictures on LA's Red Line violates the "9/11 Law"?

Taking pictures on LA's Red Line violates the "9/11 Law": "Keith tried to take a picture on the Red Line in LA, and was told that he was breaking the '9/11 Law' by a metro worker who swore at him and threatened him with arrest when he asked what the '9/11 Law' was.



Him: Hey! It's against the 9-11 Law to take pictures down here man!


Me: You mean the Patriot Act?


Him: No pictures.


Me: Could you explain? What law do you mean?


Him: You are lawyer?


Me: No.


Him: No pictures. You could be a terrorist. Very strict!


Me: How about I take a picture of you?


Him: F**k you...(I couldn't believe it either)


He then proceeded to huddle in the corner and speak into his radio. Next thing I knew, a booming female voice very loudly announced over the loudspeaker 'Attention to the gentleman in the plaid shirt: You are not allowed to take photographs in the Subway. You will be arrested if you continue to take photos and harrass the metro worker.'


I was incensed/surprised/embarrassed/horrified/bewildered. People started staring.


Then the voice continued: 'The gentleman in the plaid shirt: You must approach the callbox near the escalators and speak to the sheriff.' I didn't budge. So she said it again, this time louder...


'Okay' I thought, I'll play along...I went up to the callbox and pushed the button. A new voice this time, this one male, boomed out and said, 'Why are you taking photographs sir?'


Me: 'What law am I breaking?'


Voice: 'You can't take pictures sir, we don't know why you are taking pictures.'




Link

(Thanks, Keith!)



"


(Via Boing Boing.)



Now the Sirens have a still more fatal weapon than their song, namely their silence... Someone might possibly have escaped from their singing; but from their silence, certainly never.
Franz Kafka "The Silence of the Sirens" (October 1917)


Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? Translates to "Who Watches The Watchmen?" There, I said it, now I'm on a list. Sorry, nothing funny to add.

thePrisoner (ready to use my camera phone at a moment's notice)

For Andy


I know I didn't get you anything for your birthday, so consider this a belated gift.



-Mr. DNA (gots some of the fear too)





Friday, May 09, 2008

Cheese Friday™ : Paternity test?

My son, Mr. Kane, said something alarming yesterday.

"Dad, I don't want cheese on my sandwich."
"Why?" I asked.
"Because I don't like cheese Dad."
" ......... "

I think I blacked out for a while after our exchange.


-Mr. DNA (wonders if the mailman is a vegan)

Thursday, May 08, 2008

ForChumps.blogspot.com

I just started a new blog called "...For Chumps!". Everyday I will be posting things that are for chumps. So, if you want to avoid being a chump, check the site out at http://forchumps.blogspot.com/

Not checking out "...For Chumps!" is for Chumps!

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Happy Birthday. Uncle Toby's Mommy.

It's my mother's birthday today. Much as I would like to be with her to wish her a happy birthday in person, I'm forced to let my good kiddy friends do it through the magic of
interweb viddy-o™
.

The video includes my good friends Mr. K and Miss E and a plastic birthday cake with a candle. The candle lights up and at the end of the song you blow it out.


HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR,

Love Toby

Nazi's + Space = Space Nazi's



Check out the movies website here:
IronSky.net

Monday, May 05, 2008

Cheese Friday™ : Special Monday Edition

This is the 4th year in a row I have posted my salute to Cinco de Mayo.


Have you ever wondered, "Why we should celebrate Cinco de Mayo in the U.S.?"

Read on my friend, read on.
There will be a test later.



Cheese Friday™ would like to present the "Queso de la Sombrero" in honor of the Mexican Army kicking some French ass at the Battle of Puebla in 1862. This victory had some far reaching repercussions.

Here's what happened:

May 5, 1862, General Laurencez led 6,000 - 8,000 French troops toward Puebla, Mexico, just 100 miles from Mexico City. Expecting the attack was General Ignacio Zaragoza, a Texas-born Mexican who had a force of 4,000 troops, many of them agricultural workers armed with antiquated rifles, machetes, rakes and hoes. The battle would take place in a muddy, uneven field.

To show his contempt for the Mexicans, Gen. Laurencez ordered his troops to attack through the middle of the foes’ defenses, their strongest position. The French cavalry went through ditches, over adobe ruins and toward the slope of Guadalupe Hill. By then, the cavalry, exhausted and nearly disbanded, failed to achieve its goal. The Mexican army stood its ground. Gen. Zaragoza, who had no experience in military tactics but was a veteran in guerrilla warfare, ordered his troops to go after the French, who fled to Orizaba, where Zaragoza attacked the French again, forcing them to flee to the coast.

Now some of you may say, "I'm an American, why should I care?". Well, in 1862 the United States weren't so united. We were in the middle of a Civil War and it was in France's best interest for the US to be split in two.

France was very concerned about the growth of the United States. The North American country’s rate of expansion and power was threatening to the other world powers. If France was successful in conquering Mexico, the possibility of marching north to aid the Confederates in dividing the United States into two less powerful and less threatening countries was very real.

If it wasn't for General Ignacio Zaragoza and his rag-tag bunch, the beginning of each school day growing up in California could have been very different. We might have pledged our allegiance to a Confederate Flag with French accents.

Cinco de Mayo, it's not just about selling beer.



-Mr. DNA 

Friday, May 02, 2008

MacDonalds Dumps Winehouse As Spokesmodel



"Ba da Ba da dah, I'm huffin' it!"™

Thursday, May 01, 2008

Bike

Kane has a bike, he can ride it if he likes, it's got no basket or bell that rings, no things to make it look good...

Well, except him!



Mr. Kane can ride a bike. Dad is proud.


-Mr. DNA (can ride his bike with no handle bars, no handle bars)